Saturday 3 February 2018

Is there an app for that?

Maybe it’s because it’s been January- new year, new me etc- that there have been so many references to keeping active on social media. Now I’m going to be honest and admit the keep active, 10,000 step brigade are getting on my already strained and painful nerves! A public health nagging service for the middle classes was not on my Christmas list. OK I know you love your fit bit but let’s be honest just like the puppies, it’s for life not just for Christmas. Will I  check in with you in a few months time just in case?
 The things I really needed weren’t on the Christmas list either; the grabber which stops me having to bend so low and triggering pain would not have been brought down the lum by Santa in this house. Nor would the sock “putteroner” device that I still can’t bring myself to purchase. It seems I’d rather curse loudly and sometimes leave the house minus socks instead. Pride and all that...
It’s not really that I’m in denial and a grumpy b....., or being honest, not only that. No it’s that I’m recognising more and more what it takes for disabled people ( and I am one now) to simply do ordinary tasks that most people take for granted and even are guilty of a bit of “able bodied smugness” around! 
A trip to Glasgow left me completely knackered last week. I tell you it was worse than any 10k I’d run in the past and I definitely didn’t get a medal, a free banana or even an endorphin release at the end. What I got was looks of sympathy when I got off the train and made my slow and painful way along the platform. By the time I got to the ticket barriers ( it was a long train-honest) most folk from the train were at home having their tea. I’m  still learning to master my new crutches and I did feel more secure but they brought a new meaning to the phrase painfully slow. 
So I’m thinking I might devise an app that rewards new achievements for those whom 10,000 steps are now ( or have always been) a mere treasured dream. My one would award points for everyday achievements and the odd special one too. This would include using the grabber to pick up a peanut before the dog got it ( if you are interested, so far it’s a draw (Audrey 1-Cara 1). 
Before you scoff go on -try it! It would include getting your boots on without swearing. ( that would be a resounding 0 ). It would include getting in and out a black cab without a sweat breaking out. It would include getting a seat at rush hour on a train when they announce the platform and you are nearly trampled in the rush. 
There would as well be special awards for the taxi drivers who put their steps out and run round to help you, for bus drivers who lower the bus and wait till you are sitting to move, they would also be for the folk who stop to ask how you are and if they can help.

But the biggest one would be a high five for Andrew who although he cracks bad jokes about being an Uber driver and can’t stifle every sigh when I ask if he will drop me off and grudges a taxi when the bus pass is tucked away in his pocket; he is the very reason I’m still able to be out there in the world doing my thing and surviving ( so far). And his ability to make me laugh and not just at myself, is what makes everyday a good one. Is there an app to remind you to say thank you enough?

Scanxiety?

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