Monday 25 May 2020

Relationships before work; the new normal?






I saw my Grandson today and had a great virtual catch up. He like to sing bits of songs now so we can join in. Three craws, the current one. So as we know in Scotland, Thursday is the big day. It’s the day that we know if the numbers are still  going down and we get let out of lockdown, cautiously and we get to meet in person.  So those numbers are crucial. If I hear you’ve all been down the beach at Porty or been to ‘big Isa’s’ caravan* and the numbers have gone up I will not be happy! 
But if we’ve all been following guidelines then I get to see my family this weekend. Sadly not all together but I will take what I can! We will have to avoid our Grandsons full on mouth kisses but if I can just see his smile, smell his hair as he rushes bye I will be happy. I want to see how his Mum and Dad are fairing too! Working and full time parenting a cheeky nearly two year old is seriously difficult. But for him having his Mum and Dad all round the clock has been a gift.
Our daughters smile lights up rooms and to see her close by will lift my spirits. She’s worked hard throughout. Molly, her Jack Russel,has loved her though it. In terms of my life not much else changes. But that’s ok for now.

As lockdown eases I’m hearing of the people who have been doing the couch to10k and the difference it’s made. I’m delighted for them, honestly. There’s been the keep fit with the kids, yoga to start or end the day. I’ve watched this with such sadness too.
I used to love to jog, do yoga at times but mostly walk, especially with all dogs who have kept me company, over the years.  I’ve so many memories I can draw on. But to be honest it’s so infuriating that nobody thinks; what could we do for the disabled community. Consider that maybe they get a bit pissed off we rarely see programmes aimed at our wellbeing? The answer is you bet we do! 
I’ve lost strength during the lockdown. The main exercise that helps me ( and many others as it as the water protects from pain) is in water. Hydrotherapy was stopped at lockdown and my local pool is closed. 

Why not open local pools for only disabled people?

Some early work has shown that the lockdown has seriously affected the mental and physical wellbeing of people who are disabled and those who are shielding. We need to think about this for people. Many of us will feel anxious still about the virus. I know I’ve lost confidence outside the house. My mood has been affected and that makes this all worse. I’m sharing this not to look for sympathy, it’s really to look for equality. It’s probably too late for this lockdown but the chances are another may follow and some thoughts about the needs of proactive support for those with disabilities of all varieties would be welcome. 
Paradoxically I find I’m anxious about things changing too. Reflecting on this I think I want to protect having more time. I’m inclined to keep busy, often with friends and family but also with work and this can fill life with so much that I become exhausted and I’ve not time just to ‘be’. 
Maybe that’s the biggest thing lockdown has given some people is time just to be. Who wants to go back to a world of commuting, of constant travel,of being away from home. Suddenly some people at least have had time to spend with family they only have in holidays. In Japan with lockdown, the Suicide rate has reduced 20 % as they been able to work from home and be part of their families and communities. It’s a simpler, more authentic life. Where relationships count above work.
One of the things I’ve noticed is that the time togther has really made Andrew I closer, in our protected wee bubble. I really don’t want to lose that, we’re so fortunate and rich in the things that matter. I wish you and yours a safe ease out of lockdown

* Reference to Janet Godleys daily briefing voice overs. The language is juicey but it’s a good laugh in dark times! 

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