Saturday, 6 April 2013

Return to sender? Day 6

It's write a letter day for day 6. We could write to our older selves or to our condition.

I have previously written to my younger self and loved that...my most important message i found being enjoy life and don't sweat the small stuff . But writing to my older self paralysed me. Is it tempting providence? Or do I find it hard to visualise myself as an older person....preferring to trust the here and now? I suspect a history of cancer stops you being complacent about the future and that's where I am just now.

So instead it's a letter to my condition...breast cancer.

Dear Cancer

Twice, yes twice you have now come along to disrupt my life. You weren't invited, I'm not even high risk but that didn't stop you. Both times you came when I was least expecting it. Not prepared at all. No full cupboards or freshly laundered life prepared for any guests. No, just muddling along each day and even at times feeling in my prime and there suddenly you were.

Did I at some level invite you without realising? Was life too easy till then? Did I do something to deserve your visit?

Now I know I'm at least fortunate you didn't invade everything-you didn't bring your extended family -and that made it easier to get rid of you. I hope you aren't still squatting somewhere that I don't know about ,ready to sneak back in when again I'm not looking. But I don't know really do I?

Hence this letter. I'm telling you, you are not welcome in my life nor in any of the lives of my family and friends. They are precious and don't want you either.
So can I suggest you find another way to use that impressive ability to reproduce and grow.

Perhaps you could produce energy to heat homes of those who struggle. What about using it to heal those with degenerative disease, replacing those cells that cause such devastation? And if these things are too hard just now surely there is something else. We live in Scotland......you could eat midgies perhaps....no Nobel prizes for that maybe,  but believe me we would be grateful.

So I bid you goodbye, you aren't welcome back, go and do something useful so I can wish you well in the future.

Not yours
Audrey

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