Tuesday 1 November 2016

Making sense of paradox, day 1 of my blogging challenge

The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change. 
Carl Rodgers

Day 1. #HAWMC
My blogging journey started with my second diagnosis of breast cancer five years ago and took me along a journey of personal reflection, self discovery, cathartic rants, political activism, health activism and more recently  to my third diagnosis ot breast cancer. I've written everything from poems to polemics. I've tried to only write when I've felt the need to say something and usually I find something bubbles to the surface and It finds a way onto the page.
I've found writing a hugely therapeutic expereince and it's re-engaged me with a part of myself I'd let go when I left school, the part of me that wrote for pleasure. There something about the process of writing down my thoughts that helps me get clarity, that helps me get release and let's me wrestle some demons too. I hope it helps others along the way but really if it only helps me then that's ok. 
The condition that's changed my life is breast cancer and I hope what I write helps people understand the impact of a condition like cancer. There's a complex paradox in what I want to share. I want people to understand that although many people will survive a diagnosis of breast cancer, nonetheless the impact on their lives is still huge. I want people to understand that although it's awful to go through, you can come through it and there will be better times ahead. I want people to understand that they may discover their own potential and strength through treatment but I also need them to know to be kind to themselves. I want people to understand that some people they thought were friends will disappear but not to worry as others will fill that gap and they'll learn to really cherish the people they love. 
Yes it's a paradoxical expereince in many ways....maybe that's why I've needed to write about it. Making sense of paradox, that's why I write I guess. 
This is day one of a month long challenge to write in response to a daily prompt. Wish me luck! 

2 comments:

  1. Audrey, I am so pleased you are taking part in this. It's going to be quite the challenge, but I think it's a great idea for us to stop and reflect on our advocacy journeys. Looking forward to reading your thoughts over the next 30 days!

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  2. Thanks Marie, last time I really learned something and it made me write regularly. Hope i can keep it up! X

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