Audrey’s Blog on living well with disability and breast cancer

" I cant go back to yesterday because I was a different person then." Lewis Carroll Alice in Wonderland It's all been about women's voices this week. But more importantly than that its been about really hearing them too. As Co- Chair of the Scottish National Action Plan on Human Rights for Health and Social Care I heard the voice of Pam DuncanGlancy explaining why the role of health and social care is about more than providing care, it's about enabling people to live fulfilling lives, however they define that. Thank goodness for active citizens like Pam who articulately challenge us all, on behalf of so many. I also heard my own Mum take part in a workshop ( its a long story and well done to the compassionate folk of Argyll and Bute Council, NHS and voluntary sector for enabling this). She had joined me on a wonderfully scenic road trip and then came along to meeting I was facilitating, to enable the creation of a person-centred network.

The Kelpies I spoke to my Mum the other day. She is coming to visit next week and I'm looking forward to it. She doesn't live near us any more, having moved to be nearer to my sister over a year ago now. We spoke of maybe having a day trip to Oban which she would enjoy and that I would take her to see the Kelpies, they have been developed since she left. She will also see her grandchildren and her friend who she has missed.   We will take her some trips down memory lane. She loves a trip to the Botanic gardens in Edinburgh which are nearby. We might even take her to the beach to enjoy an ice cream outside. Guaranteed to bring back memories of childhood for us all. She will enjoy times when the Cara the dog rests her head in her lap and brings a calm affection to her. Koshka the cat will offer the odd cuddle if he can sneak in to her room. We will probably seek some old films she enjoys on the TV. I will do my best to encourage her to enjoy some

There has been a theme of comfort zones   ( or maybe more pushing myself out of them) around for me recently. It's something that I encourage others to do all the time, whether its in coaching, or in my consultancy work or indeed if we are adjusting to illness. What's important is to be open to do that yourself in my position -and to notice your own reactions. I was chairing a session at  the NHS Scotland event on person centred care; entitled Ask Me Hear Me. One part of the session was two learning consultants from The Thistle Foundation demonstrating live how to approach an interaction in a person centred way. Would I be willing to be interviewed by them they asked, of course my reply. And then I noticed my heart rate increase as that moment approached. I trusted them so that wasn't the issue, it was what might come up that was a bit scary. A ground rule of not speaking about my family was established which helped and I knew in a person centred way,

after the storm My mission this week was to create the space to write and relax. As last weeks blog indicated it took a few days to achieve this but as ever this beautiful place started to work its magic. And it's as my book was taking shape again I read the quote from Maya Angelou. We a have lost some very special people this last year and she was certainly one of them. Her wisdom, her courage, her call to our humanity, her poetic writing a huge inspiration. The quote I read was:   "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you."      It really had an impact on me as I read it. Is that what drove me to write my story really? I honesty couldn't describe it as an agony but when I sat down to write its what wanted to come out. I wanted to fully understand and articulate what I have learned along the way. In the hope that the process itself would finally settle some of it in my own mind. And maybe it would help people travelling a