Showing posts from January, 2018

A heart restored

Today I read a stable genius plans to make  smaller nuclear weapons to be more usable so my head  was low  when I boarded the souless train I slowly drained a tasteless coffee I stared at a WiFi  engaged screen I waited for my station Coat on Rucksack on Stick in hand I gazed at the door it opened I raised my head a hand held out to help me off I hesitated at first then took it  with gratitude the kindness extended warmed my soul this January day my head was lifted a day transformed a heart restored

But it’s not cancer!

I had just been diagnosed with breast cancer in my 30’s when I read an article in the Herald which mentioned that breast cancer was the "sexy" cancer to get. I was furious and ranted for days about this. If anything didn’t make me feel sexy, it was dealing with the fall out of cancer treatment. My scarred breast with surgery and radiotherapy was painful and forever changed, my confidence and wellbeing at rock bottom, my anxiety levels high, I was in a state of exhaustion and hyper-reactivity. He ( and yes it was a he) went on to say that because breast cancer attracted attention, a whole month of awareness to itself, research funding it was kinda cool to have breast cancer. He seemed to believe there was a pink hue that coloured it all away. I wrote several letters to the paper ( those were the green ink days, no twitter then to express disgust) but tore them up. None were ever sent. My release was a tear soaked pillow- and not for the first time. I’ve been reminded of t