Audrey’s Blog on living well with disability and breast cancer

Apologies to the Bard on this his birthday, but I wrote this a few years ago after my second diagnosis of breast cancer. I must admit when I was thinking about the future I didn't think I would be doing what I'm doing now. But I guess this life expereince has taught me not to waste life and to make the difference I can when I'm able. For all who face adversity, you never know what life can hold, don't waste a minute of it.... Tae a breast! Wee sad and broken tim'rous breast, O, what a panic was in my head! I need na worried awa sae hasty, Wi' fear and fright! I wad be laith to lose thee Withoot a fight! But breast, I tried before wi’ sma’ gain In proving foresight may be vain; The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men Gang aft agley, An' lea'e me back to face more pain, And chance o’ more! And sae to clinics I maun go And nae new cancer to show! Decision time wis loomin Wid staying as is stop me from bloomin Aye the answer had to be and sae To the su

January can be a difficult month for many, depression can stalk us when there is such little day light. Its lightened only by scenes like the one above that greeted me this week in Inveraray. Like many I have experienced and witnessed the impact of depression on myself and people I love and its a devastating illness. So often it's undiagnosed and diminishes lives, steals joy, steals life even.   It's the great unspoken illness. Years ago we used to whisper the word cancer, now it's said more openly; but not so depression. It's still held secret often and nursed as something shameful; a failing. But no one would choose depression, would they? That dark tunnel of anxiety, that crushing burden of joylessness, that feeling of hopelessness, those weights tied to your life dragging it down making the simplest of tasks a nightmare to achieve. No-one would choose it and yet still guilt sneaks in, part of the symptoms it seems, destined to feed the condition, to f

Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it. Goethe My life at the moment is a very delicate and rich balancing act of running my business, attending hustings with the aim of being selected to stand as an MP and being a Mum, a wife and a daughter too. As I write my daughter is traveling to see us and I'm so looking forward to seeing her for a few days. Last weekend was seeing my Mum in her care home, looking fragile but happy with new friendships strengthening. Undoubtedly the trip to see her great grandsons was her highlight. Just the smiles on their faces bring her alive. As we returned back to the home we were greeted by the cat. Her name is Mama one of the other residents told me. Mama was the focus that day. Everyone from the staff to the residents had a special hello, a purr filled welcome. One of the gentleman was in singing mode too and as Mum joined them in the dining room, everyone was listening; a special atmosphere settling. His words may

It started with a pledge to write a book about my experiences and life and how they have shaped me. Not on January 1st but after my annual visit to Windsor for the leadership dialogue, at the end of January. So I got down to it, found I loved committing those words to the page ..... it became a therapeutic process. Acknowledging the grieving I had done but also the joy I have experienced and what I have learned; I recommend it, I really do. Recently I joined a creative writing group and that too has enriched my life hopefully in time my writing too. So all good....until I tried to write the last chapter. Perhaps it's that phrase itself that makes it hard: the last chapter. Part of me realised then that maybe I was almost accepting that this would be MY last chapter. That second cancer diagnosis (however early and not life threatening at this point) had crept into my future and was threatening to steal it...but really only in my own head. I'm so glad I realised i