The Struggle Bus


                                                            Image of the struggle bus 

I’ve been quiet for a few weeks online. I’ve got new medication, followed by covid then antivirals, antibiotics and a cough that scared the horses that are all to blame for the radio silence. 

I’m scared to say I’m improving but I think I’m having more good days. Strangely the virus seems to have increased my pain so as well as my cocktail of pain killers, self management techniques I’m adding in CBD oil. I suspect it’s helping and like everything it’s a learning exercise. Like life itself really.

A diagnosis of covid changed plans yet again. How much this pandemic has shaped our lives this last few years. As always our friends and family were attentive and kind. We realised after we were both recovering how worried others were for us but we both realised that we weren’t too bad. Although it’s been slow to cast off the tiredness and for me pain has been a daily and nightly challenge. A weekend away has intensified the fatigue and pain as well. It’s also made me realise that holidays far from home are just no longer sensible or even desirable. 

It’s a loss realising that but it’s also a relief. I’d been torturing myself with ‘shoulds’ and now there is peace in accepting what is my reality. But we live in a stunningly beautiful city and country with so much still to discover. And with some good fortune sometime still to explore it. So long as we can find accessible places to stop! That frankly is a whole other story or blog. 

I heard a great saying recently -I’m on the struggle bus-. I’m definitely on the struggle bus just now and like too much in this world, it’s definitely not accessible! 

You see when things are accessible I can enjoy life just like everyone else. So credit to the Usher Hall in Edinburgh. Yesterday we went to see the Belgian National Orchestra playing a few classical pieces, most notably the Sans-Saëns Symphony No 3, the ‘Organ Symphony’. We had an amazing seat and simply wonderful experience. When access is good I feel relaxed and equal in the world. Frankly it shames us all how unusual that is my experience. 

Me waiting in the concert.
The best view of the orchestra.


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