I can hear the noise as my chest moves up and down. I look around for the cat, the phantom snorer in the house. No-not here. Then I cough and it changes, of course it’s the wheezy crackles that have been my soundtrack since Christmas. Much improved, so much so that I’m free from the hospital bed and back home. Christmas has been packed away, a new year welcomed, gifts sniffed and tried-some eaten and life has returned to a normal rhythm. Except I feel so different. I’m depleted and fragile. I feel like a two dimension of my three dimensional self.
Christmas itself was full love, fun, games, amazing food and great company. By the 27 Dec most of us had flu symptoms and were slipping down a slope still saying we were fine. By the 28 I gave in and asked for help. I was admitted to hospital and despite a brief return home, I stayed there until Jan 11. It shocks me as I write that. Those days melted into the new year, never to be reclaimed as I got the help I needed to recover from Influenza A, Covid-19 and chest infections. My recent cancer treatment had resulted in anaemia which meant I was very susceptible to infection. Perhaps perfect storm is an over used term but it’s what it was. Andrew too has had flu but it seems not covid. He’s finally recovering and my admission at least meant he could recover without having to be a carer. Because carers dare not get ill, it’s the 24 hour job with no time off.
“The NHS will last as long as there are folk left with faith to fight for it”
Aneuran Bevan
I’ve been a statistic in the great NHS crisis narrative, fuelled by a harsh winter reality and a right wing media relentless undermining of a service under huge pressure from rising need and the aftermath of a devastating pandemic. This is not a service that’s failing, it’s a service that’s being failed by a government who are in turn failing in their duty of care to their citizens. And if you think I’m over egging this, remember this is the government that wants to reduce our human rights and walk that information to its inevitable conclusion.
The anger that arose as I write this shows my energy is improving. But mostly you find me reading, listening to podcasts and watching the odd series. The content needs to soothe my weary bones, provide an optimistic hue over these January days and not be too demanding! It’s a delicate balance and a tough ask. So far Slow Horses on Apple TV has kept me awake and engaged more than anything else. Watch it from series one, you won’t regret it.
And finally covid did not show up on the LFT we did at home, it was a PCR on admission that identified influenza and covid. My best advice is wear a mask and if you aren’t well, don’t mix with people until you are better. And get your vaccines, it’s never too late. Yes I was fully vaccinated and maybe that’s the reason I’m home now and recovering.
I’m completing this blog with my humble thanks to everyone who has helped us through and a special mention to Cat who has been awesome. She makes me laugh and feel loved all in the same breath whilst confidently and kindly making her special difference in the world.
Till next time, you will find me resting sooooo keep the noise down, eh?
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